Richard and Marilyn
Mixed media on canvas/ framed/ 24”x 28” x 2” / $ 450
Love: The Romantic Kind
My first romantic encounter happened when I was in sixth grade. While\a safety crossing guard at a slow intersection, a good looking classmate named Ralph stopped every morning to keep me company. I don’t remember what we talked about, but I do know that we had a lot to say to each other. The attraction blossomed to the point of organizing a mock wedding complete with bridesmaids and rabbi. During my basement rec. room reception, we ate cookies and played spin the bottle. The bottle never stoped my way to give us a chance to kiss, but it was soon obvious that one of the bridesmaids was more attractive to Ralph than me. That was the end of our romance, love affair and marriage.
Years later, when my future husband first kissed me goodnight on the lips, it was only a peck, but electricity soared through my body. Though the moment lasted a second, the memory of that kiss lasted a lifetime. I wondered what was happening to my body and why I felt weak all over. We hardly knew each other, so I didn’t pretend to be in love, but he certainly captured my attention and I wanted to get to know him better. We spent the next many months romancing each other.
An explanation of the difference between love and romance that I read on-line says, “Romance is the expressive and pleasurable feeling from an emotional attraction towards another person often associated with sexual attraction. And love in best defined as a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes that ranges from interpersonal affection to pleasure.”
Romance is at its peak in the preliminary stage of a relationship, when people go out of the way to make gestures of fondness. It is not until they understand each other and learn to compromise that love can deepen and take over. Romance is important for it brings the couple closer to explore boundaries. Though a time of wishful thinking, flirtation, and lust, it can also produce fake and unrealistic yearnings. It’s only when small daily acts of consideration and kindness occur that the carpet unfurls a path t\ leading to love.
I have loved. More than once I’ve been romanced and then loved. And, though there were several liaisons that ended with us going separate ways, feelings of love for the person have endured to this day. I acknowledge how each relationship provided me with strength to tackle the challenges I faced at the time.
This summer, when I ran my “Do You Need a Mother” booth at Shift Festival, many young visitors asked for advice of the heart. What I noticed is that they are impatient. They long for a love partner without wanting to go through the romance and relationship building phase. Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. It takes a long time to build enough trust to communicate honestly. Romantic wooing is part of the deal and it stays as part of the formula of those in long term relationships. For love needs to be nurtured as much as a plant requires fertilizer.
I look back fondly to memories of romance—the time I was a newlywed in Europe, sharing a delicious meal accompanied by enough wine to let my husband and I dance, hug and kiss our way back to our hotel though deserted Parisian streets. —or when I was in Monte Carlo, hoping to cheer my injured husband by dancing before him to an orchestra that was playing in an empty restaurant. —or when the clock struck 12 on New Year’s Eve, 2000, and dressed in finery, my fiancé and I were at the top of the Seattle’s Space Needle watching fireworks exploding below.
Romances are pleasures and shared moments that propel us into deeper love. It is a tool that prolongs and reinforces the bond between two people. Taking time to reaffirm your appreciation and acknowledge how special your partner is, will only strengthen your relationship. Though love may deepen over time, it can also be lost if taken for granted. It is important to periodically renew your commitment, to play, to laugh and to share special experiences that remind you why you fell in love in the first place.
Do share some of your most romantic remembrances on my blog site below.
Art is always for sale at marilynne@eichingerfineart.com.
Reference
Difference Between Love and Romance. retrieved from https://www.quora.com/What-is-the-difference-between-love-and-romance
