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The Importance of Love

Most of us are fortunate for we have experienced love.   As children we had family members who held and cherished us. As adults we found partners and formed bonds based on love. Have you ever stopped to think about what happens to those children who are never held or told that they are special.

In my search to understand the root cause of youth homelessness I wondered about the long term effects of never being touched or cuddled? or being neglected or abandoned?

A cornerstone study about infant neglect began in the 1980s when Dr. Nathan Fox from Harvard Medical School along with colleagues walked into an orphanage in Romania. Due to the country’s ban on abortion the number of orphan babies had soared. 170,000 children were in 700 overcrowded and impoverished facilities across the country without sufficient caretakers. Though the facilities were clean the infants were emotionally neglected. Left all day in their cribs the babies were changed periodically and fed without being held. The nurseries were eerily quiet places. Crying babies were ignored and so they stopped making sounds since crying didn’t produce attention.

Dr. Fox and colleagues have been following these children for over fourteen years. In the beginning they saw autistic-like behaviors such as head-banging and rocking. As the children grew their head circumferences remained unusually small. They had difficulty paying attention and comprehending what was going on around them. Over time, 50 percent of the children suffered from mental illness. They displayed poor impulse control, were socially withdrawn, had problems coping and regulating their emotions and were shrouded in low self-esteem. Pathological behaviors manifested themselves such as tics, tantrums, stealing and self-punishment. Their intellectual function was poor giving rise to low academic achievement.

Those children who were lucky enough to be put in a loving foster home before the age of two were able to rebound. Their brain’s electrical matter as seen on MRIs looked normal by the time they were eight. However, those who entered foster care later where not so lucky. They were left with permanent damage.

Closer to home is the Perry Preschool Project in conjunction with Nurse Family Practitioners. Children were followed until the age of forty with many successful interventions developed through the the years. Researchers concluded that, “without repeated acts of love, a child’s brain doesn’t make the growth hormone needed for proper mental and physical development.” Without it children are left permanently scarred.

Even small insults of shame and rejection can impact a youngster’s ability to survive. Verbal abuse from parents such as, “I can’t believe you embarrass me like that.” or “You Idiot! Who do you think you are?” hurts and affects a child’s self-esteem. These children are the ones who grow up to be cruel to animals, set fires, take drugs or simply withdraw into themselves.

Is there hope for these youngsters? Psychologist Philip Fisher at the University of Oregon has been studying the corrosive levels of abused children. He claims that their abnormal levels can be impacted by reducing stress, their own as well as that of their are care givers. Educating natural and foster parents so that they understand what happened to the child helps them realize that they are not dealing with a normal brain. Instead the youngster make the same mistakes over and over again, the frustrated adult is taught patience. They are shown how to reduce their own stress levels as well as that of the child. Behavior modification programs, reward systems and support groups provide positive paths that can replace feelings of hopelessness. Targeted interventions such as computer-based brain training games also help some malfunctioning children learn to tune into the cues they are missing. Quite a bit of work is being done in this field with positive results mounting.

For those of us who are fortunate, let’s take nothing for granted. Giving and receiving love is a blessing to be cherished. Happy Walentine’s Day to you with all my love.

For sale on Amazon by Marilynne Eichinger: The True Story of Streetwise, overcoming homelessness and beating the odds. $2.99  Go to Amazon.

References:

http://www.apa.org/monitor/2014/06/neglect.aspx:
Drs. Nathan Fox, Charles Zeanah and Charles Nelson study of Romanian orphans.

http://healthland.time.com/2012/05/24/the-measure-of-a-mothers-love-how-early-deprivation-derails-child-development/ – Lack of Love.

http://www.rand.org/pubs/research_briefs/RB9145.html – Rand published research on education programs that work. – Early interventions for at risk children.

http://evidencebasedprograms.org/1366-2/65-2 -Perry School and Nurse Family Partnership