After painting this scene I thought of my older children in Northern California, wondering if, as I age, I will be forced to leave the area I’ve been living in for nearly forty years ? Will my children want me near them or will I be considered a burden?
Senior Moves
A few days ago, my next door neighbor announced that he and his wife were moving to the East Coast to be closer to their children. A day later another woman talked about selling her house and going to a retirement home out of state. I will miss these neighbors whom I’ve known for years. They are threads in the fabric of my life and without them, my cloth will rip and leave gaping holes.
Their current dwellings will likely be sold to families with children who will energize our street with their playful antics. The slow moving couples passing by my house on afternoon outings will be replaced by skateboarders, kids on bicycles and sidewalk chalk artists. When school reopens, these children will play with classmates who live near them. Their parents will invite families with similarly aged children to barbecues in the summer and birthday parties year round.
I am an observer of change, even though I am outside the circle of young mothers. Having young bodies on streets where I live shows how life cycles. I listen to parents talk of the difficulties of homeschooling children during a pandemic and hear how they integrate their jobs with family life. It is interesting to hear them discuss ways the past year has altered thoughts about the future. Though burdened by responsibility, they seem spirited, adaptable and hopeful, while my elderly friends, missing their families and past freedoms, aren’t. A weight on many of my neighbors minds is what to do about aging parents. Their stories make me sad, for I don’t like to think of myself as a burden, though I know it could happen soon.
The hardship of aging has always been a two-way strain for families across the globe. Well-known stories about Eskimos no longer able to contribute to the group tell of being taken to sea to be set adrift on a floating iceberg or walking into the night to freeze and be eaten by a polar bear. Those who practiced this form of death with dignity for the good of the community, believed that another world awaited them after death. Children, rather than sending their parents off to disappear in a retirement center, believed they were helping their elders move on to the afterlife. This form of euthanasia, though not widespread, is no longer practiced because government subsidies insure survival of their villages.
Walking through the hills of Hong Kong twelve years ago, I spied an elderly mother, a delightfully wrinkled woman who looked to be ninety, resting on a blanket while observing shoppers come and go. Her daughter, a shop owner, would occasionally join the old lady to chat and pass the day in familial companionship. Their conversation was filled with smiles and laughter.
Children in China are taught Confucianism, a doctrine stating that an adult child has a duty to care for elderly parents. And, though filial piety still persists, there is a growing demand for private nursing homes and senior centers. Due to the one child policy and increasing life expectancy, the population in China is aging faster than ours. Their children, especially those in rural areas, leave to find work and are not around to care for parents.
Nursing homes are out of reach for most older citizens who don’t want to go into them anyway. Eighty-four percent of elders prefer to stay home alone and not burden their children who have financial needs of their own. Old-age industries, such as voice-activated alarms connected to video cameras installed in front of televisions and other devices, are developing, allowing seniors more freedom until they become ill. Unfortunately, Confucian principles of filial piety don’t work in modern economies and pressure is being put on the government to underwrite the cost of senior care.
Recent surveys show 901 million people worldwide to be 60 and older, with projections that by 2050 the number will reach 2.1 billion or 21.55 percent of the global population. Geoworld Magazine published a study of 105 countries and rated them best to worst places for old people to live, taking into account seven categories—life expectancy, health care, safety, happiness, property prices, cost of living, and pension start age. Of the top ten, Finland ranked number one, followed by Denmark, the Netherlands, Switzerland, Australia, Austria, Canada, Norway, New Zealand and Spain. The United States is 28th. The ten worst countries are Iraq, Kenya, Ukraine, Venezuela, Cambodia, Nigeria, Iran, Egypt, Namibia and the Dominican Republic.
The Happiness index also lists Finland first, followed by Norway, Iceland and the Netherlands indicate that living in a cold climate can be good for health and well-being. What keeps Finland’s seniors happy? For a start, they are highly visible at all kinds of social and cultural events as well as the great outdoors where they speed by on bicycles and skis. The population of Finland is aging faster than anywhere else in the world except Japan, so the country developed networks for home based care. The government makes it easy for elders to use public transport, exercise in pools and gyms, and visit museums, libraries and theaters. Co-housing experiments where older citizens are housed with students in buildings with communal spaces for crafts, exercise, and lounging provide a family atmosphere for young and old.
Maintaining community is at the heart of elders aging well. The pandemic made them computer savvy since it was the best way to maintain connections with the outside world. Through platforms like ZOOM, seniors maintain ties that soften the misery of being isolated. As more families are faced with aging parents, and more elders realize the need for care in community, society is finding creative solutions to keep them in their homes and not tucked away in senior centers to die alone. More than one-third of Coronavirus Deaths nationwide are linked to nursing homes and other long-term care facilities. In Oregon, that number is 53 percent.
Virtual villages have sprung up where neighbors help neighbors stay neighbors, and home based care services are becoming more common in many states. Longevity has forced communities to reimagine old age and insure that elders stay productive and happy as the reach the end of their life cycle.
References:
Revelations. Initial Journey, Eskimos-Old Age. retrieved from http://www.theinitialjourney.com/features/eskimos-old-age/
Xinhua. (2019) China’s care for the elderly boosts ‘silver economy. China Daily. retrieved from https://www.chinadaily.com.cn/a/201910/08/WS5d9c4004a310cf3e3556f300.html
Ireland,S. 2020. World’s Best (and Worst) countries For Older People to Live In, 2020. Geoworld Magazine. retrieved from https://ceoworld.biz/2020/01/29/worlds-best-and-worst-countries-for-older-people-to-live-in-2020/
( 2021) More than One-Third of U.S.Coronavirus Daths are Linked to Nursing Homes.New York TImes. retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/us/coronavirus-nursing-homes.html
